“This is my friend, Jaden. I love him so much. He is a good soul, a kind soul, an innocent soul. He needs to be protected. I will do that. No one shall hurt him. I will protect him, forever.” -Ed, my “helper entity”
This was a message I found in my body. I found it recently after I cleared one of my helper entities named Ed from my body. As near as I can tell, Ed died about 800 years ago and never crossed over. He wandered around the planet watching people and being mostly reclusive…. No matter where Ed traveled on the planet, he only saw innocent beings, most kids, being hurt by adults who had also become hurt and were passing that hurt on to their children. He had decided that as long as he is stuck in this “earth hell” as he called it, he was going to see how many young kids he could protect. He dedicated his existence to being a “helper entity.”
I met Ed when I was 3 years old, Mom was going through a hard time in her life and was having difficulty not taking it out on me. I understood what Mom was going through, but it still hurt to receive her pain. I started to think there was something wrong with me… I had began my journey towards surrendering my innocence. That energy had attracted Ed.
One day, while I was broken down and in tears, this kindly old man came up to me and started to comfort me. He didn’t have a body anymore, but that somehow made him safer. Spirit friends wont hurt you like people in bodies will. He made me smile.
Ed sought to comfort me and tell me that I wasn’t a bad person. I hadn’t done anything wrong. He explained that people on this planet take their pain out on each other… they just can’t help it. He thought it was like a disease, hurt people spread their hurt to others. As he talked, I could see that Ed was not only wise, but also the kindest and most selfless being I had ever met. He had died on his 3rd lifetime here, beat to death by his enraged, drunken father. He swore not to be reborn into this hell. He was now trapped between worlds as an entity, a being without a body.
I spent many long days and nights getting to know my new friend Ed. He loved me and cared for me in a way that I had never seen before. He really “got” me. He understood my pain and loved me for the innocence and kindness that I was. He would tell me, “your job is to keep being kind, my job will be to protect you forever.” He was totally willing to commit his life to helping me and protecting me.
Over time we went through various rituals to help him to integrate into me, to join with me in my body. By the age of 7 that was completed. (But it caused serious complications that Ed couldn’t understand- this had always worked with other kids)
Ed became my internal advisor and best friend. He gave me room to live my life and only “came out” when I needed him, when I was lonely or when I was being threatened in some way, then he would take over to protect me.
Forty years later, Ed is so integrated into my being, that I don’t see him as separate from me. He was just another aspect of me, albeit a slightly glitchy one. As I got older and interested in enlightenment/consciousness, I worked with Ed to release his issues, so we could be more internally harmonious. Ed could become angry and violent if triggered by someone I loved- especially if I was being wrongly accused.
I’ve learned that even though these beings are inside of me, they are still their own being. I cannot clear things for them. In most cases, things that didn’t immediately clear when I let them go, belonged to other internal entities I was hosting. I have tried hundreds of times to clear certain issues, that were not mine to clear, so they would not change. Helper entities make the process of change and transformation very slow.
Even though I have cleared entities in my body THOUSANDS of times, until today, I was never ready to acknowledge and choose to let go Ed, so he could not be cleared. It was only today after dropping into a startling rage after being falsely accused by a loved one, that I even became aware that this was another being, separate from me.
As I began using my Access Consciousness tools to clear what was underneath this rage, I started to become aware of the presence of Ed my helper entity and partner entity. I heard this enraged man saying, “This is my friend Jaden. He is a kind and innocent soul. NO ONE, NO ONE shall hurt him, EVER!” My body began crying.
I recognized the situation immediately. I invited Ed into clearing his implants of anger and rage. He relented, he let them go. I thanked Ed for his service, then cleared my agreements with him.
“Everything I said I would do for him, everything he said he would do for me, I now destroy & uncreate them all. Pod-poc.”
And said, “Thank you, you may go now.”
I could feel his creaky old energy leave my crying body. There was immediate relief.
I asked him if he wanted to cross over (leave the earth realms) and he said “yes, would you please.”
I cried and began the clearing.
“Truth, what was your job?” (he replied ‘to protect innocence’)
What was your job before that?
What were all your jobs before that?
What will your job be in your future?
What will all your jobs be in all your futures?”
I wanted to clear him fully, so I released his identities too..
“Who are you? (he replied ‘Ed’)
Who were you before that? (he replied ‘Eduardo’)
Who were you before that? (he replied ‘Enrico’)
Who were you in all your lifetimes before that?
Who will you be in your future?
Who will you be in all your futures after that?”
As I kept speaking his energy field kept getting more filled with light. As I finished, I could sense him drop into infinite peace and expand into a flash of light that became as big as the universe and then disappeared. Ed had crossed over.
In his place, I found his message of commitment in my body.
“This is my friend, Jaden. I love him so much. He is a good soul, a kind soul, an innocent soul. He needs to be protected. I will do that. No one shall hurt him. I will protect him, forever.”
And I cried and cried. My body released 40+ years of stored pain, confusion and hurt.
I felt this deep sadness and loss, I asked, “What contribution can I now receive from this energy?” and the sadness melted away into light and love.
I cried some more.
I let go of my best friend today.
A man who I respected and loved deeply. A man who respected and loved me deeply.
He dedicated his existence
to protecting innocent children
all over this planet.
He has now found infinite peace.
May the world no longer have a need for his services.
Ed, you are loved.
I continued my processing…
Everywhere I bought into the viewpoint that Ed was my only friend…
Everywhere I created that Ed was the only person who ever understood me…
Everywhere I created that Ed was my life partner…
I destroy & uncreate all that, and return it to senders with consciousness.
The story unravels more…
How far down the rabbit hole do you want to go?
Ed had 3 lifetimes on earth.
1- Enrico (died an old man in Guatemala)
2- Eduardo (still alive)
3- Ed (Eddie) (died at 8yrs old in Europe)
After Ed 3 died, (as an 8 year old child at the hands of his drunken father) he dedicated his existence to helping other innocent children. He found me. We bonded.
When I was 27, the universe brought me and the living version of Ed #2- Eduardo together in school for a semester. That began the not-so-subtle process of my awakening… and the start of many weird things to come.
Six years later, he was drawn back into my life again. He had tried to kill himself and so I took him in, gave him a place to stay. For a year the living version of Eduardo lived in the same house with the entity of Ed who was in me. My wife was not amused. It was the strangest time in my life, but a time of extreme magic and deep change.
I kept getting the message from many sources, “Eddie needs to go”, “You need to let go of Eddie”
I understood this in the only way I could at that time, I needed to remove the living Eduardo from my life.
It was probably the single most painful thing I have ever done. Eduardo was the only person I had ever experienced unconditional love with, but I removed Eduardo from my life, sent him away to live on his own.
A year later, I sought Eduardo out and brought him back into my life. Wife gone now, he was one of 3 roommates in a large house. After 6 months, more messages, “You have to let go of Eddie!” “You must permanently disconnect from him.” For the second time, I rejected the living Eduardo. I banished him from my life. Cut all contact. This wounded Eduardo deeply. I could witness that, but seemed powerless to stop myself from doing it.
The process of disconnecting from Eduardo was always a strange one with unusually potent emotions, yet I always felt quite detached from the whole process at the same time.
It’s only now that I recognize that it was actually the entity of Ed who was stepping up in me and doing the rejecting & banishing of Eduardo. It was the same soul tangled in illusion, creating hurt on another version of itself.
The tangled web we weave…
December 23, 2013